Dan Trathen DMin, PhD Clinical Psychologist & Certified Business & Life Coach

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Erosion in Marriage

It seems like everything these days is being blamed on El Nino or La Nina. I heard the other day that a couple was blaming their marriage problems on the frequent storms hitting California. Their real relational problems were not revealed, but it seemed that the erosion of their marriage didn’t just happen overnight. Undoubtedly, it took years and years of water, frost heaves, wind, and dry conditions to shake the foundation of their relationship. Then, one day the hill was so distressed that it gave way and slid and they lost confidence that they could recover. Sand bags can only hold back so much. What are we “sand bagging”? How is it that we allow the storms of life to over-power us to the point that we continue drifting? The fact is that the El Ninos of marriage are negative patterns that have been allowed to develop and can distress us through their constant repeated blows. There are at least five negative patterns that contribute to marital problems.

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