Dan Trathen DMin, PhD Clinical Psychologist & Certified Business & Life Coach

Trusting Hope

Third is trust or having confidence in our beliefs. For example, many have confidence in their abilities to overcome life’s adversities. Others may have a faith in God and therefore are hopeful not only in the outcome, but also in life. Still others may have hope in another person’s abilities to succeed. In other words, […]

Mental Hope

The experience of hope has several aspects. First is the mental component. Hopeful individuals are more optimistic in their thinking. When confronted with a happy or a difficult situation, they look for the “pros and cons”. They tend to evaluate the situation in light of their personal or professional goals rather than “jumping to negative […]

Coping Skills During Life Transitions

Life transitions are often difficult, but they have a positive side, too. They provide us with an opportunity to assess the direction our lives are taking. They are a chance to grow and learn. Here are some ideas that may help make the process rewarding.


Accept that change is a normal part of life. […]

The Top 10 of Wise Sayings

I recently came across a “top 10 wisdom list” by Thomas Jefferson. Maybe this list will jog your mind into remembering what your parent, teachers, or grandparents said to you.

1. Never put off until tomorrow what you can do today.


2. Never trouble another for what you can do yourself.


3. Never […]

Wise Words Worth Living

I Can’t Get these Proverbs Out of My Mind

All of us have had teachers we remember for one reason or another. I remember “Mrs. Proverbs”. She would walk down the rows of chairs saying, “an idle mind is the devil’s workshop”, or “busy hands are happy hands”, or “a penny saved is […]

Deflecting Conflict and Insults- Step 3

Step 3 Bring Kindness into Cruelty

Intimidators need to be encouraged to focus their attention inward instead of blaming or ridiculing. This is essential when cutting remarks are an expression of anger. In moments of confusion, people can be redirected to change negative habits.

Deflecting conflicts and insults exercises your mind and can be more […]

Deflecting Conflict and Insults-Step 2

Step 2 Change “Put-Downs” to “Put-Ups”

Change put-downs into put-ups and act as if nothing offensive is happening. This is based on the idea that it is worse to take offense than to give offense. Meanness can be turned into kindness when you:

1. Agree in fact, in theory, or hypothetically to stop power struggles.


Deflecting Conflict and Insults

Step1 Learn Verbal Karate;

Conflict is inevitable, but when you are caught off guard by a verbal side swipe, wounds can cut especially deep. Rude remarks may come from misguided efforts to enhance self-esteem by making others look bad. It may be a cry for attention, or generalized anger that is taken out on […]

Principle of Practical Living

I recently came across a similar list penned by Thomas Jefferson, February 25, 1825, in a letter to his name sake, a friends’ young son. His list was entitled, “A Decalogue of Canons for Observation in Practical Life.” Maybe this list will jog your mind into remembering what your parent, teachers, or grandparents said to […]

Guiding Lessons of Life

All of us have had teachers in life that have been memorable for one reason or another. When I was in 11th grade, we had a study hall teacher whom we called “Mrs. Proverbs” because she would walk down the rows of chairs to ensure we were studying, and if we weren’t she’d say, “an […]